Seizing the Memes of Production

Most people want to hear about the money, so I’ll start with the money.

First, wire $1,000 to a crypto exchange based in Hong Kong. Some investors use only services that meet U.S. regulatory approval, but when you want the highest return on a shitcoin, this is wrong. If you find a coin on an exchange that can afford stadium naming rights, you’re too late. The criminal wins are in the slurry of obscure, low-market cap projects trading on websites that look like they’ll give your computer an infection. My mark was a dog-themed crypto that traded at roughly $0.0000011. I could afford a little more than a billion. Thank both sides of the aisle. I had stake money from government-issued pandemic aid, and a deregulated red state home base that left me free to bounce cash between boundless backdoor servers and across hemispheres. Friends in New York working just a few blocks north of Wall Street were locked out.

The coin was called Shiba Inu. Its founders were anonymous. It had no discernible use case and made gassy promises about decentralizing the financial system. But it had great SEO, bound to slipstream behind a bull market run.

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